Tank birthday and I'm a Geezer

[Haus]

Had that in a townhouse community we used to live in. Always a resident or two who take it on themselves to police the place. Our self-appointed noodnick used to report anyone who planted flowers alongside the end unit because that was common area that residents aren’t allowed to alter. And she would report every unit where she saw work boots sitting outside the front door-HOA rules stated they could only be outside by the back door.

Dang this thread was started in 2011 and has 90 pages! Much respect to you Paul for keeping this front page lol

 

[Paul B]

90 pages!! OMG, who reads this stuff?

 

[diana a]

90 pages!! OMG, who reads this stuff?

It's a page turner!

 

[Paulie 069]

Diana they don't allow Dodge ball in school any more because almost everyone now is a Snowflake or knows a a Lawyer who is a Snowflake. They don't allow drinking from a hose either probably because some lawyer owns the bottled water company. I think they fill those bottles from a hose anyway. Probably from one of those collapsing Home Depot hoses, the ones with the warnings that read, "Don't drink from this hose because in California it was found to cause cancer and athletes foot.
But if you are in France or Bayonne New Jersey, you will be fine.

It's a good thing I am already married because it would be hard finding a girl with my front tooth missing.

Girls were a big part of my life as I was always a Lady's Man.

Nice knees chicken legs, heck long shorts were in style long before today’s style,, I like the real short shorts Of the late 70s-80s gave the fellas a nice breeze and full leg tan, not just tan from knees down to ankles

 

[Paul B]

Yesterday we went to Costco to get food for the boatload of people we have coming out in a few hours. While I was there I bought a new garden hose for my boat dock.
The hose I have there now got very sticky from the sun and it makes huge black streaks on my white boat so I need a new one.
You also have to clean your hands with "Brillo" soaked in "Lestoil" to get it off your skin.

When I got home I read the instructions on the new hose because thy are written like this so I had to rent the Hubble Telescope so I could read it.

It says, don't keep in the sun. There isn't much shade in my marina behind my boat and it basically bakes all day. I assume it is good if you live in Alaska where it is night time for 6 months.

It also says "do not drink from this hose".

The inside is made out of stuff that bacteria just love and you could die. I fill my boat freshwater tank with this hose so thats what I would make the inside of the hose out of.
Now every time I use the hose, I will have to quarantine it for 76 days which is hard because here in New York our boating season is 76 days.

Why can't they make the inside of the hose out of Tupperware or the stuff they make the black boxes on airplanes out of?

You just can't win.

 

[diana a]

My guess is that the hose is not made in the USA but China

 

[Paulie 069]

Yesterday we went to Costco to get food for the boatload of people we have coming out in a few hours. While I was there I bought a new garden hose for my boat dock.
The hose I have there now got very sticky from the sun and it makes huge black streaks on my white boat so I need a new one.
You also have to clean your hands with "Brillo" soaked in "Lestoil" to get it off your skin.

When I got home I read the instructions on the new hose because thy are written like this so I had to rent the Hubble Telescope so I could read it.

It says, don't keep in the sun. There isn't much shade in my marina behind my boat and it basically bakes all day. I assume it is good if you live in Alaska where it is night time for 6 months.

It also says "do not drink from this hose".

The inside is made out of stuff that bacteria just love and you could die. I fill my boat freshwater tank with this hose so thats what I would make the inside of the hose out of.
Now every time I use the hose, I will have to quarantine it for 76 days which is hard because here in New York our boating season is 76 days.

Why can't they make the inside of the hose out of Tupperware or the stuff they make the black boxes on airplanes out of?

You just can't win.

Brother have you ever saw those collapsing hoses made out of nylon they wrapped up to like 6 inches and then when the water gets in them they stretch out to like 100 feet The material is very strong and we’ve had one on our boat for four years and if you ever worry about bacteria you could just run hot water through it at our marina there is a sink that we could just hook the hose up to and turn the hot water on and that’s how I like to wash the salt off the windows on the boat with hot water because if you try to use any type of scrub brush or rag you will scratch your windows with the salt

 

[Paul B]

I would never buy a hose made in China. It is actually made in America, if not, it would still be in Costco.

Paulie, I actually have three of those collapsible hoses. I myself didn't buy them because I think those are not made in the US and I would not have bought them.
I find that they are not very durable and I couldn't use them at my last marina because the water pressure was to high and they exploded instantly. I am not sure if they would last in my new marina and if I could find an American one, I will try one.

 

[Paulie 069]

I would never buy a hose made in China. It is actually made in America, if not, it would still be in Costco.

Paulie, I actually have three of those collapsible hoses. I myself didn't buy them because I think those are not made in the US and I would not have bought them.
I find that they are not very durable and I couldn't use them at my last marina because the water pressure was to high and they exploded instantly. I am not sure if they would last in my new marina and if I could find an American one, I will try one.

They do sell White hoses, then you wouldn’t have to worry about marks on your boat

 

[Paul B]

So this morning I was going to make a nice breakfast for My wife and our best friends next door. I forgot it is Friday and we normally go out for breakfast.
I figured I would make some eggs, potatoes toast etc and I got some nice farm fresh potatoes and I was going to make a new breakfast recipe for the potatoes which meant I had to slice them very thin.

We have one of those hand slicer things where you slide the potato back and forth and it goes into the slicer and slices the thing.
I have used it many times and you don't have to be a rocket scientist. But you really have to be careful.

So it was going well until I sliced off the end of my finger. This isn't good because I am getting blood all over the slicer and I didn't want to get it on the potatoes because we have ketchup if we want them red.

So I wrap a paper towel around it and figure I can still keep slicing to finish my breakfast menu.
I take another potato and continue slicing. Oops, I slice my other finger and almost cut off the tip of that one off.
I didn't go to college but I assumed it was time to stop using the slicer.

I take a paper towel and wrap the two fingers up together and try to clean up the blood before my wife sees it and gets the horrors.

No such luck, the blood is kind of dripping all over the place faster than I can clean it up. So now I have to wake my wife because I can't keep wrapping this thing up with my left hand and I didn't want to make to much of a mess.

I tell my wife I need a band aid and she sees it and panics and wanted to get the paddles and jump on my chest, give me CPR and call the paramedics to fly a helicopter here to rush me to the ER while she ties a tourniquet around my neck.
(I live five minutes from the hospital.)

She wants to come with me but I convince her to stay home and my friend next door decides to take me to one of those "Emergency, Urgent Care Docs in a Box."

We go to the nearest one with the biggest sign that reads "URGENT EMERGENCY CARE, NO WAITING" Just walk in Doctors on Call.

It's closed

It opens at 8:00 and it is ten to 8:00. So we wait outside while I am making a puddle of blood in the parking lot.

After a while I go to the door and hold up my arm and the "Nurse" comes out and says, we will open soon but we have no doctor. He "may" be here in 20 minutes but I am not sure.

The area is surrounded by golf courses so I figured he was on the 18th hole and was lining up his last shot.
I ask where the next "Doc In The Box" is. Thank God I don't live in Buck Chuck Oregon and these places are more numerous than Starbucks.

We drive to the next "Urgent Care, No Waiting Emergency" places and it's closed. Of course it is, But it opens in 5 minutes so I go through the motions and show the "Nurse" my bloody arm and she lets us in after I put my mask on.

She needs my insurance cards, next of kin, drivers license, photo ID, social security number, Astrological sign, address of my cemetery, first pets name, Mothers maiden name etc.

Then she hands me a pen to sign the 6 consent forms so they can see me. Now I lost one or two pints of blood and am getting a little stupefied and get the forms all full of blood do they really didn't have to write down why I was there as the doctor could tell by the blood stained paper.

The Dr. comes in and soaks my hand in a little bowl of liquid and says he will be back shortly. By the time he comes back the thing is almost overflowing from blood, I am A Positive.

He wraps up the finger with the missing tip and goes to give me a shot in the finger where the tip is still hanging on. But as he is trying to give me the shot, the other finger is bleeding through the dressing going on to the other finger. Now the Dr. is getting a little "Viclemp" and I can see he is getting nervous.

He keeps wrapping the finger up but it is bleeding through. I finally said I will hold the bandage tight so it doesn't leak so you can fix the other finger.
He gives me 3 or 4 shots and looks for the needle and thread. I think he left it in his golf cart.

Finally he starts to stitch this thing up and during each stitch he says things like "OOH No, OMG, Dam, Come On," etc which doesn't give me much confidence and I was wondering if he went to medical school or plumbing school.

Finally he gets 7 stitches in and he goes to the other finger which is still bleeding profusely like when you used to use a canister filter and the hose inadvertently comes off and squirts water all over the painting on the wall that your Mother N Law gave you for your wedding gift.

He looks puzzled like I am going to offer advice to stop the bleeding so I say jokingly "Why don't you use that stuff you put on your face when you cut yourself shaving". He says, yes, I have that stuff in a bottle. Good Idea.

He puts a little stick in the bottle and says this is going to hurt. Of course it will. So he puts a little into the pool of blood that used to be my finger tip and I hit the ceiling. Like OMG!!!

It felt like when you are SCUBA diving in Aruba and you point up to show your girlfriend what the bottom of the boat looks like and a Man of War jellyfish wraps a stinging tentacle around your finger so you jerk your hand down at the exact same moment a lionfish was making a grab for a baby Achilles tang
and impales you with 3 or 4 poisonous spines forcing you to grab the nearest thing witch is a spire of fire coral.

If you ever did that, you know what this "death fluid" feels like. I would rather he heated up a sword and melted me together like they do in old western movies.
So he gives me 5 shots of lanicane in that finger and pours the stuff on it. It still won't stop bleeding so he keeps wrapping it in multiple layers of cloth hoping the blood won't seep through until after I get home.

I am sitting here now wiping blood off my keyboard waiting for this to stop and I know it will soon as I am almost out of blood.

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[diana a]

Oh Paul! Hope it heals quickly.

 

[Paul B]

I was going to put mud and parasites on it because I know it makes you immune.

 

[Paulie 069]

So this morning I was going to make a nice breakfast for My wife and our best friends next door. I forgot it is Friday and we normally go out for breakfast.
I figured I would make some eggs, potatoes toast etc and I got some nice farm fresh potatoes and I was going to make a new breakfast recipe for the potatoes which meant I had to slice them very thin.

We have one of those hand slicer things where you slide the potato back and forth and it goes into the slicer and slices the thing.
I have used it many times and you don't have to be a rocket scientist. But you really have to be careful.

So it was going well until I sliced off the end of my finger. This isn't good because I am getting blood all over the slicer and I didn't want to get it on the potatoes because we have ketchup if we want them red.

So I wrap a paper towel around it and figure I can still keep slicing to finish my breakfast menu.
I take another potato and continue slicing. Oops, I slice my other finger and almost cut off the tip of that one off.
I didn't go to college but I assumed it was time to stop using the slicer.

I take a paper towel and wrap the two fingers up together and try to clean up the blood before my wife sees it and gets the horrors.

No such luck, the blood is kind of dripping all over the place faster than I can clean it up. So now I have to wake my wife because I can't keep wrapping this thing up with my left hand and I didn't want to make to much of a mess.

I tell my wife I need a band aid and she sees it and panics and wanted to get the paddles and jump on my chest, give me CPR and call the paramedics to fly a helicopter here to rush me to the ER while she ties a tourniquet around my neck.
(I live five minutes from the hospital.)

She wants to come with me but I convince her to stay home and my friend next door decides to take me to one of those "Emergency, Urgent Care Docs in a Box."

We go to the nearest one with the biggest sign that reads "URGENT EMERGENCY CARE, NO WAITING" Just walk in Doctors on Call.

It's closed

It opens at 8:00 and it is ten to 8:00. So we wait outside while I am making a puddle of blood in the parking lot.

After a while I go to the door and hold up my arm and the "Nurse" comes out and says, we will open soon but we have no doctor. He "may" be here in 20 minutes but I am not sure.

The area is surrounded by golf courses so I figured he was on the 18th hole and was lining up his last shot.
I ask where the next "Doc In The Box" is. Thank God I don't live in Buck Chuck Oregon and these places are more numerous than Starbucks.

We drive to the next "Urgent Care, No Waiting Emergency" places and it's closed. Of course it is, But it opens in 5 minutes so I go through the motions and show the "Nurse" my bloody arm and she lets us in after I put my mask on.

She needs my insurance cards, next of kin, drivers license, photo ID, social security number, Astrological sign, address of my cemetery, first pets name, Mothers maiden name etc.

Then she hands me a pen to sign the 6 consent forms so they can see me. Now I lost one or two pints of blood and am getting a little stupefied and get the forms all full of blood do they really didn't have to write down why I was there as the doctor could tell by the blood stained paper.

The Dr. comes in and soaks my hand in a little bowl of liquid and says he will be back shortly. By the time he comes back the thing is almost overflowing from blood, I am A Positive.

He wraps up the finger with the missing tip and goes to give me a shot in the finger where the tip is still hanging on. But as he is trying to give me the shot, the other finger is bleeding through the dressing going on to the other finger. Now the Dr. is getting a little "Viclemp" and I can see he is getting nervous.

He keeps wrapping the finger up but it is bleeding through. I finally said I will hold the bandage tight so it doesn't leak so you can fix the other finger.
He gives me 3 or 4 shots and looks for the needle and thread. I think he left it in his golf cart.

Finally he starts to stitch this thing up and during each stitch he says things like "OOH No, OMG, Dam, Come On," etc which doesn't give me much confidence and I was wondering if he went to medical school or plumbing school.

Finally he gets 7 stitches in and he goes to the other finger which is still bleeding profusely like when you used to use a canister filter and the hose inadvertently comes off and squirts water all over the painting on the wall that your Mother N Law gave you for your wedding gift.

He looks puzzled like I am going to offer advice to stop the bleeding so I say jokingly "Why don't you use that stuff you put on your face when you cut yourself shaving". He says, yes, I have that stuff in a bottle. Good Idea.

He puts a little stick in the bottle and says this is going to hurt. Of course it will. So he puts a little into the pool of blood that used to be my finger tip and I hit the ceiling. Like OMG!!!

It felt like when you are SCUBA diving in Aruba and you point up to show your girlfriend what the bottom of the boat looks like and a Man of War jellyfish wraps a stinging tentacle around your finger so you jerk your hand down at the exact same moment a lionfish was making a grab for a baby Achilles tang
and impales you with 3 or 4 poisonous spines forcing you to grab the nearest thing witch is a spire of fire coral.

If you ever did that, you know what this "death fluid" feels like. I would rather he heated up a sword and melted me together like they do in old western movies.
So he gives me 5 shots of lanicane in that finger and pours the stuff on it. It still won't stop bleeding so he keeps wrapping it in multiple layers of cloth hoping the blood won't seep through until after I get home.

I am sitting here now wiping blood off my keyboard waiting for this to stop and I know it will soon as I am almost out of blood.

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Maybe next time make pop tarts

 

[Paul B]

Today I collected water and while that was being diatom filtered my friend helped me trim sponges. He actually removed a few pounds of them and I am very happy. I can't do it because I have two fingers bandaged up and I can't get them wet.

When you cut this sponge it exudes a milky stuff that makes the skimmer go nuts and it kept overflowing on the floor.

I collected water from here and we had a huge storm last night so it was filthy which is why I have to filter it.

This is what it looked like in the bucket during collection. Not exactly pristine coral reef water.

All my thousands of brittle stars climbed up to the highest point and spawned making my water milky.
Them and urchins do that when you change the temp, water conditions or when I walk in front of the tank in my Speedo.

Of course as I was filling containers with filtered water we got side tracked and it overflowed on the floor. Twice. It looked like Noah's flood and now my floor is very dull because the salt dried on it. I can't clean it until I get my stitches out.

 

[Paulie 069]

Today I collected water and while that was being diatom filtered my friend helped me trim sponges. He actually removed a few pounds of them and I am very happy. I can't do it because I have two fingers bandaged up and I can't get them wet.

When you cut this sponge it exudes a milky stuff that makes the skimmer go nuts and it kept overflowing on the floor.

I collected water from here and we had a huge storm last night so it was filthy which is why I have to filter it.

This is what it looked like in the bucket during collection. Not exactly pristine coral reef water.

All my thousands of brittle stars climbed up to the highest point and spawned making my water milky.
Them and urchins do that when you change the temp, water conditions or when I walk in front of the tank in my Speedo.

Of course as I was filling containers with filtered water we got side tracked and it overflowed on the floor. Twice. It looked like Noah's flood and now my floor is very dull because the salt dried on it. I can't clean it until I get my stitches out.

I’m sorry Paul but do you think you might be milking this finger thing,, I mean I’ve read everything you have ever posted about being in the war ,, come on if that happened to your fing Ed s in the jungle, you would have dipped them in mud then wrapped them up with banana leaves and swam thru a swamp before dinner lol,, getting softer buddy, much lov n respect

 

[Paul B]

, come on if that happened to your fing Ed s in the jungle, you would have dipped them in mud then wrapped them up with banana leaves and swam thru a swamp before dinner lol,, getting softer buddy, much lov n respect

How do you know I didn't do that?

 

[Paul B]

My long spined urchin may be dying. I noticed he is losing some spines and thats what that normally means.
He may be 10 years old as I forgot when I got him and I don't know their life span. I think I had my last one for about that long but I forgot as I don't write this stuff down. If he croaks, I will get another one as they are so cool and reminds me of when I used to have hair.

 

[Paulie 069]

My long spined urchin may be dying. I noticed he is losing some spines and thats what that normally means.
He may be 10 years old as I forgot when I got him and I don't know their life span. I think I had my last one for about that long but I forgot as I don't write this stuff down. If he croaks, I will get another one as they are so cool and reminds me of when I used to have hair.

I just got my first urchin and he’s kinda boring to be honest but he’s family now so he stays

 

[Sponge]

Paul B. How much room does a long spine need. I love how they look. But would my 100 gallon. Be enough room with the rock and all. Tank is only 18 wide. And the rock takes up about half of the that from the sand to about half way up

 

[Paul B]

Yes you could put one in there. This one lived 8 years in my 100 gallon tank. I don't know how they do it but they can cram themselves into any hole that is as large as their body.