-
Folks, if you've recently upgraded or renewed your annual club membership but it's still not active, please reach out to the BOD or a moderator. The PayPal system has a slight bug which it doesn't allow it to activate the account on it's own.
Tank birthday and I'm a Geezer
- Thread starter Paul B
- Start date
reefsandrotts
NJRC Member
Best of luck tomorrow Paul hopefully you packed a goody box for the doctor to use the correct clamps and grease fittings this time.
Paul, will be awake telling the Dr what to do...ha
Paul B
NJRC Member
I am waiting to go to the hospital. They called and changed it from 7:00 to 9:00 am so I have time to do nothing. I actually watched a video of the shoulder replacement and I told my surgeon that if has a problem to wake me up so I can give him some pointers. He wasn't amused. 
I also may bring my own hardware for him to use. I also told him if my new titanium shoulder isn't made in the US. Leave it out or use wood.
The hospital is about 40 minutes away.
While I'm waiting, I am brading the dorsal fin spines on this guy.
I also may bring my own hardware for him to use. I also told him if my new titanium shoulder isn't made in the US. Leave it out or use wood.
The hospital is about 40 minutes away.
While I'm waiting, I am brading the dorsal fin spines on this guy.
Last edited:
momof6kids
NJRC Member
Hope you are coming home today and recover quickly.
Paul B
NJRC Member
View attachment 104535
So yesterday I had my left shoulder replaced (I may make a lot of typos) I have to wear that sling that keeps my arm a few inches away from my body 24/7 even sleeping with it. I love that hospital and wish I could rent a weekend there.
I have no pain at all and am thinking of hitting it with a hammer to make sure he actually replaced it. He said I have so much arthritis in there that he couldn't fix it if he wanted to and my rotator cuff is shredded and must be in my neck somewhere, so he doesn't have to use it
The surgery was a piece of cake. As a matter of fact, 15 minutes into the operation I had a dream. At least I hope it was a dream. There was a big cake on my stomach and all the people in the operating room were singing Happy Birthday to the Rastafarian anesthesiologist as he was blowing out the candles with my oxygen tube.
The hospital is great but like most hospitals, you can't get any sleep. First of all because of something with the anesthesia, I had to pee all night every 15 minutes like clockwork. So to take me to the bathroom they had to disconnect the two IV bags they have going into my hand, (one of the bags was filled with natural seawater (I could tell because It had live amphipods in it) and the other was an antibiotic with Prizapro) Then unhook the tubes on my legs that inflate around my legs every 8 seconds one at a time. The motor that does that goes WWWWOOOOOSSSSHHHHHHH...WWWWOOOOSSSHHHHH. So I asked for the pee container.
If a bubble goes through the tube to your hand it also has an alarm that just goes BEEP..BEEP...BEEP constantly.
When I decided to try to go to sleep at 2:00am I turned on the TV and was watching "The Greatest Storm" where George Clooney was the Capt. of a Sword fishing boat and was in a huge storm.
My bed had an alarm on it so when I got out of bed to either fall on the floor or jump out the window that goes BBBBBBBBBbbbbbeep-
BBBBBBBBBbbbbbbbeep etc until I got back into bed.
If anyone on the floor pushes the emergency button for anything like they want a toothpick, pain killer or cat food the thing would ring outside my door. It would continuously go. Ding, ding, ding.........Ding, ding, ding.......Etc.
The nurses constantly take your temperature and blood pressure. The blood pressure machine goes brbrbrbrbrbrbrbrbr,brbrbrbrbrbrbrbr etc.
So last night went something like this. In the movie George Clooney is being thrown all around the boat as my legs are being inflated one at a time so I keep hearing: WWWWOOOOOSSSSHHHHHHH...WWWWOOOOSSSHHHHH. As that is going on I hear blaring:
Doctor Kildare please come to the nurses station Stat.
Then my hips raise, WWOOOOOSSSSHHH...WWOOOOSSSHH. My left leg inflates, WWWWOOOOOSSSSHHHHHHH...WWWWOOOOSSSHHHHH. and I hear Ding,ding,ding. George Clooney is being thrown against the port side of the boat.
"DOCTOR KILDARE PLEASE COME TO THE NURSES STATION ". Ding, ding, ding.
Beep, Beep, Beep, My right leg raises WWWWOOOOOSSSSHHHHHHH...WWWWOOOOSSSHHHHH.
The bed also has inflators that randomly raise your head, hips and shoulders and the blower that makes that work sounds something like the inflator for the legs but it has a few less double you's and Hs.
Then my hips raise, WWOOOOOSSSSHHH...WWOOOOSSSHH. My left leg inflates, WWWWOOOOOSSSSHHHHHHH...WWWWOOOOSSSHHHHH. and I hear Ding,ding,ding. George Clooney is being thrown against the port side of the boat. "DOCTOR KILDARE PLEASE COME TO THE NURSES STATION ". Ding, ding, ding.
Beep, Beep, Beep, My right leg raises WWWWOOOOOSSSSHHHHHHH...WWWWOOOOSSSHHHHH.
The nurse comes in as a huge wave washes Clooney onto the starboard side of the boat
Nurse says: "My Christmas Birthday Baby Baldassano, I need to take your vitals". My left leg raises.
WWWWOOOOOSSSSHHHHHHH...WWWWOOOOSSSHHHHH. ding,,ding,,ding
Open your mouth and stick out your arm for your pressure. brbrbrbrbrbrbrbrbr,brbrbrbrbrbrbrbr. I can tell she used the wrong thermometer by the taste
I got to pee. BBBBBBBBBbbbbbeep-BBBBBBBBBbbbbbbbeep
"KILLDARE WHERE THE HELL ARE YOU?" The nurse gets called away, probably to look for Killdare and the pressure machine is still going up
brbrbrbrbrbrbrbrbr,brbrbrbrbrbrbrbr. The pressure is going up over 120 psi and it isn't stopping. My arm looks like a strand of linguini and wax is starting to shoot out of my ears right into my Jello.
WWWWOOOOOSSSSHHHHHHH...WWWWOOOOSSSHHHHH. Ding, Ding, ding....Ding Ding, Ding. brbrbrbrbrbrbrbrbr,brbrbrbrbrbrbrbr. My head raises WWOOOOOSSSSHHH...WWOOOOSSSHH.
Clooney gets impaled on the steering wheel...... "Kildare you Quack....Your Fired" I have to pee so I stand up because gravity helps.
BBBBBBBBBbbbbbeep-BBBBBBBBBbbbbbbbeep so I have to be fast. My right leg inflates as my hips raise
WWWWOOOOOSSSSHHHHHHH...WWWWOOOOSSSHHHHH .... WWOOOOOSSSSHHH...WWOOOOSSSHH.
Beep ,,Beep Beep.
Clooney gets washed off the boat into the sea only to be torn apart by school of designer clownfish. Blood pressure machine is still going
brbrbrbrbrbrbrbrbr,brbrbrbrbrbrbrbr And the nurse is no where to be found. I have to pee. BBBBBBBBBbbbbbeep-BBBBBBBBBbbbbbbbeep
My left leg raises.
WWWWOOOOOSSSSHHHHHHH...WWWWOOOOSSSHHHHH.
I got to pee. BBBBBBBBBbbbbbeep-BBBBBBBBBbbbbbbbeep Ding,,Ding "HELP,,HELP, I have fallen and I can't get up".
WWWWOOOOOSSSSHHHHHHH...WWWWOOOOSSSHHHHH. Ding, Ding, ding....Ding Ding, Ding. brbrbrbrbrbrbrbrbr,brbrbrbrbrbrbrbr. My head raises WWOOOOOSSSSHHH...WWOOOOSSSHH.
I have to pee.
BBBBBBBBBbbbbbeep-BBBBBBBBBbbbbbbbeep so I have to be fast. My right leg inflates as my hips raise
WWWWOOOOOSSSSHHHHHHH...WWWWOOOOSSSHHHHH .... WWOOOOOSSSSHHH...WWOOOOSSSHH.
Beep ,,Beep Beep.
Then about 8:00am breakfast comes. You can't make this stuff up.
So yesterday I had my left shoulder replaced (I may make a lot of typos) I have to wear that sling that keeps my arm a few inches away from my body 24/7 even sleeping with it. I love that hospital and wish I could rent a weekend there.
I have no pain at all and am thinking of hitting it with a hammer to make sure he actually replaced it. He said I have so much arthritis in there that he couldn't fix it if he wanted to and my rotator cuff is shredded and must be in my neck somewhere, so he doesn't have to use it
The surgery was a piece of cake. As a matter of fact, 15 minutes into the operation I had a dream. At least I hope it was a dream. There was a big cake on my stomach and all the people in the operating room were singing Happy Birthday to the Rastafarian anesthesiologist as he was blowing out the candles with my oxygen tube.
The hospital is great but like most hospitals, you can't get any sleep. First of all because of something with the anesthesia, I had to pee all night every 15 minutes like clockwork. So to take me to the bathroom they had to disconnect the two IV bags they have going into my hand, (one of the bags was filled with natural seawater (I could tell because It had live amphipods in it) and the other was an antibiotic with Prizapro) Then unhook the tubes on my legs that inflate around my legs every 8 seconds one at a time. The motor that does that goes WWWWOOOOOSSSSHHHHHHH...WWWWOOOOSSSHHHHH. So I asked for the pee container.
If a bubble goes through the tube to your hand it also has an alarm that just goes BEEP..BEEP...BEEP constantly.
When I decided to try to go to sleep at 2:00am I turned on the TV and was watching "The Greatest Storm" where George Clooney was the Capt. of a Sword fishing boat and was in a huge storm.
My bed had an alarm on it so when I got out of bed to either fall on the floor or jump out the window that goes BBBBBBBBBbbbbbeep-
BBBBBBBBBbbbbbbbeep etc until I got back into bed.
If anyone on the floor pushes the emergency button for anything like they want a toothpick, pain killer or cat food the thing would ring outside my door. It would continuously go. Ding, ding, ding.........Ding, ding, ding.......Etc.
The nurses constantly take your temperature and blood pressure. The blood pressure machine goes brbrbrbrbrbrbrbrbr,brbrbrbrbrbrbrbr etc.
So last night went something like this. In the movie George Clooney is being thrown all around the boat as my legs are being inflated one at a time so I keep hearing: WWWWOOOOOSSSSHHHHHHH...WWWWOOOOSSSHHHHH. As that is going on I hear blaring:
Doctor Kildare please come to the nurses station Stat.
Then my hips raise, WWOOOOOSSSSHHH...WWOOOOSSSHH. My left leg inflates, WWWWOOOOOSSSSHHHHHHH...WWWWOOOOSSSHHHHH. and I hear Ding,ding,ding. George Clooney is being thrown against the port side of the boat.
"DOCTOR KILDARE PLEASE COME TO THE NURSES STATION ". Ding, ding, ding.
Beep, Beep, Beep, My right leg raises WWWWOOOOOSSSSHHHHHHH...WWWWOOOOSSSHHHHH.
The bed also has inflators that randomly raise your head, hips and shoulders and the blower that makes that work sounds something like the inflator for the legs but it has a few less double you's and Hs.
Then my hips raise, WWOOOOOSSSSHHH...WWOOOOSSSHH. My left leg inflates, WWWWOOOOOSSSSHHHHHHH...WWWWOOOOSSSHHHHH. and I hear Ding,ding,ding. George Clooney is being thrown against the port side of the boat. "DOCTOR KILDARE PLEASE COME TO THE NURSES STATION ". Ding, ding, ding.
Beep, Beep, Beep, My right leg raises WWWWOOOOOSSSSHHHHHHH...WWWWOOOOSSSHHHHH.
The nurse comes in as a huge wave washes Clooney onto the starboard side of the boat
Nurse says: "My Christmas Birthday Baby Baldassano, I need to take your vitals". My left leg raises.
WWWWOOOOOSSSSHHHHHHH...WWWWOOOOSSSHHHHH. ding,,ding,,ding
Open your mouth and stick out your arm for your pressure. brbrbrbrbrbrbrbrbr,brbrbrbrbrbrbrbr. I can tell she used the wrong thermometer by the taste
I got to pee. BBBBBBBBBbbbbbeep-BBBBBBBBBbbbbbbbeep
"KILLDARE WHERE THE HELL ARE YOU?" The nurse gets called away, probably to look for Killdare and the pressure machine is still going up
brbrbrbrbrbrbrbrbr,brbrbrbrbrbrbrbr. The pressure is going up over 120 psi and it isn't stopping. My arm looks like a strand of linguini and wax is starting to shoot out of my ears right into my Jello.
WWWWOOOOOSSSSHHHHHHH...WWWWOOOOSSSHHHHH. Ding, Ding, ding....Ding Ding, Ding. brbrbrbrbrbrbrbrbr,brbrbrbrbrbrbrbr. My head raises WWOOOOOSSSSHHH...WWOOOOSSSHH.
Clooney gets impaled on the steering wheel...... "Kildare you Quack....Your Fired" I have to pee so I stand up because gravity helps.
BBBBBBBBBbbbbbeep-BBBBBBBBBbbbbbbbeep so I have to be fast. My right leg inflates as my hips raise
WWWWOOOOOSSSSHHHHHHH...WWWWOOOOSSSHHHHH .... WWOOOOOSSSSHHH...WWOOOOSSSHH.
Beep ,,Beep Beep.
Clooney gets washed off the boat into the sea only to be torn apart by school of designer clownfish. Blood pressure machine is still going
brbrbrbrbrbrbrbrbr,brbrbrbrbrbrbrbr And the nurse is no where to be found. I have to pee. BBBBBBBBBbbbbbeep-BBBBBBBBBbbbbbbbeep
My left leg raises.
WWWWOOOOOSSSSHHHHHHH...WWWWOOOOSSSHHHHH.
I got to pee. BBBBBBBBBbbbbbeep-BBBBBBBBBbbbbbbbeep Ding,,Ding "HELP,,HELP, I have fallen and I can't get up".
WWWWOOOOOSSSSHHHHHHH...WWWWOOOOSSSHHHHH. Ding, Ding, ding....Ding Ding, Ding. brbrbrbrbrbrbrbrbr,brbrbrbrbrbrbrbr. My head raises WWOOOOOSSSSHHH...WWOOOOSSSHH.
I have to pee.
BBBBBBBBBbbbbbeep-BBBBBBBBBbbbbbbbeep so I have to be fast. My right leg inflates as my hips raise
WWWWOOOOOSSSSHHHHHHH...WWWWOOOOSSSHHHHH .... WWOOOOOSSSSHHH...WWOOOOSSSHH.
Beep ,,Beep Beep.
Then about 8:00am breakfast comes. You can't make this stuff up.
reefsandrotts
NJRC Member
Hope you feel better soon,but you sir are too much....
momof6kids
NJRC Member
Paul, glad to see that you haven't lost your sense of humor.
Paul B
NJRC Member
i am not taking the oxy any more as the tequila alone seems to do the trick. no more capitals because the left arm doesn't move yet unless i add vodka to the tequila. i was up at 1;28 this morning because sleeping with this steel sling on is like sleeping with a cement mixer strapped around my neck....and it's running. but after all these surgeries i am used to it.
they don't even close the incisions any more. they use velcro so it's easier the next time.
they don't even close the incisions any more. they use velcro so it's easier the next time.
I hear that. When I had plantar fasciitis it was painful and had use a sleep boot on my foot. Very uncomfortable and bit heavy for sleeping. After 2 or 3 hours took it off. I think I tried for a week and then said screw it and stopped using it.
Paul B
NJRC Member
MadReefer, If I remove this sling, my arm will hit the floor, get dirty and make a big noise. 
I have to keep it on for a couple more weeks as the WD-40 penetrates the aluminum shoulder until it stops squeeking. 
The most important thing to do with a very painful "Plantar Fascitis" is to keep your face far away from your plants.
(PS, I know that hurts. My wife has it among other things)
I have to keep it on for a couple more weeks as the WD-40 penetrates the aluminum shoulder until it stops squeeking. The most important thing to do with a very painful "Plantar Fascitis" is to keep your face far away from your plants.
(PS, I know that hurts. My wife has it among other things)
reefsandrotts
NJRC Member
We all know they left it open so you could check the home depot/lowes parts you suppliedi am not taking the oxy any more as the tequila alone seems to do the trick. no more capitals because the left arm doesn't move yet unless i add vodka to the tequila. i was up at 1;28 this morning because sleeping with this steel sling on is like sleeping with a cement mixer strapped around my neck....and it's running. but after all these surgeries i am used to it.
they don't even close the incisions any more. they use velcro so it's easier the next time.